Day 147: everything is fine.

its been a while since the last update, been on vacation with my girlfriend, and dealt with many issues but over all everything seems to be ok, sure i have some days when i'm bit down and others that i'm a bit up, but life is manageable,

and the only times went i did felt bad was when i haven't took the pills on time.

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Day 124: Life Is Beautiful

Its day 124, I feel good, I feel I don't need the pills any more... but i'm still taking them at least for the next couple of months...than we will see.

I now have a girlfriend, I go out alot, I meet new people all the time and I truly enjoy life and not taking everything too seriously.

Panic attacks, anxiety and depression are long gone, some times I don't even remember I had them.

I think I will start working out today. Its been too long.

The bottom line is I feel good, I don't know what life have in store for me, but i'm ok with it :-).

I know my posts became shorter but you know how its like when you're in a relationship.

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Me, My Girlfriend and Cipralex

Hello again, Its been a while since I posted so I decided to post something, just so you'll know everything is alright and ticking the right direction with me.

I have a girlfriend now, but I haven't told her about cipralex yet...its too early for me to share that with her... so for the time being I will keep that information for my self, I feel so alive, and everything's great, we're going out a lot and I'm dealing with so many situations and things I thought were impossible three months ago... so its amazing how fast things can change.

I have no side effects at all, but it does take me a lot of time to get to an orgasm but I don't mind, its fun to take your time... :-)

Anyways, just wanted to update you that I'm already feeling that I don't need the pills any more, but my Doc advised me to stay on them for the time being...so I will.

I promise to post more soon.

Take care

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Love is in the air...

Hello again,
Hope all is well with you all, here's a quick update of what happened lately…
Well first of all I feel even better, I'm starting to rediscover myself and the world around me in a fun , entertaining way.
I'm dating this girl that I'm starting to really like…but too soon to make the call if it actually is, I'm having fun anyways.

The side effects are a far away memory and hardly notice I take cipralex in term of the side effects.
Still sometimes I have difficulties to wake up or to fall a sleep but its no big deal, probably because of the beers here and there.
I will keep you posted. Take care now.

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100 Days with Cipralex, Weight Gain, Libido & Updates

Hello everybody,
I know many of you are concerned about weight gain and libido drop...
I will try to share some light about that in this post, also i have a lot to

update you guys... so here we go...

First with what concerns you...weight gain and libido drop...

About weight gain, a mild weight gain can happen, however its nothing to worry about... because its nothing dramatic, you'll hardly notice it...

You must always remember that each person react a little bit different to cipralex, so you have to notice the changes and make the right adjustments for yourself, I can tell you that haven't gained too much weight...maybe one kg, thats all, but if you feel that you're getting too "big" go out and start running, working out, or just walking, its fun and easy with cipralex. as I mention before it varies from person to person, so notice what happens with your body and react to it in the right manner.
if you think its a big change consider:
1. talking with your doctor again(maybe you need to change the dosage or try something else.
2. start eating right, in the right hours.
3. eat healthy food.
4. start working out.

now about libido, I can tell you from my experience that my libido is in tact :) however there are waves when it gets really strong and than weaker... but its manageable and it really doesn't bother me, just gives me more control over things. but if you feel there's a problem there, there are couple of things to do about it.

1. just wait... it will usually return stronger....
2. consider what you can do or think about to increase your libido
3. maybe you're not inlove or not attracted enough? love makes wonders to the libido :) at least for me...
4. enjoy the fact that you're more "relaxed" and control things, use it to your own good, to make things better.
5. you can always consult your doctor about it.
6. you can eat certain fruits and food that helps the libido and its all natural and it does work :) i've tried it once...

hope it helps, but try to take it as it come...and keep learning. smiling and try to enjoy the fact that you're aware of things, and can control them.

ok, another post with the updates i have will come later...gotta run

take care all of you!

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96 Days with Cipralex...Feeling much better now...

Hi everybody, I know, I know...I haven't had a chance to post lately...been busy busy busy... but I feel way better now... seems like after I switched from 10 MG to 15 MG there wasn't much of a change at the beginning, but now I feel like there's a big difference...

In the last two weeks, I had another meeting with my doc, had few more dates, went out with friends, build cats condo and playground for my cat and I'm working on my psychology work... that I need to finish it three weeks...

I feel improvement in all aspects of life now, I almost forgot about the anxiety, and honestly I cant remember when was the last panic attack i had... (maybe I should just scroll back to the older posts... lol...)

I'm not depressed any more, and I enjoy life experience and whatever they throw on me...

The bottom line is that things are better, way better now... and I can finally explore myself and the world around me from a positive perspective.

I found a good solution for the alcohol thing, when I go out to pubs I just choose the beer with the lowest alcohol concentrations, that way I can drink freely and it doesn't effect me too much...

The only thing that bothers me is that sometimes its hard to fall a sleep...but hey, that's a small price to pay for what you get...

Well I have another date this week, I'm really into this love thing lately :-).

oh, and I'm singing in the morning sometimes...

OK my friends, thanks for taking the time to read this, take care and I will post another post soon.

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Day 83: Another one bites the dust...

Hello again my friends, thanks for caring and visiting my blog again :-) .

Yesterday I had another blind date... which went much better than the previous one, I think I'm getting better at this,

I was a little bit nervous before the date but when I got there I just said to my self lets do this and have fun , and than everything went smoothly and we had really nice time, if you're asking if she's the one...? well not really... but it was a good experience and we had good time and got some practice at dating and communicating with people you don't know which can sometimes be very ...alarming... if you know what i mean...
soon I have another blind date, I will update on it too, however its way easier to deal with this using cipralex, cause you can really deal with the conversation and the other person and not with your anxiety and panic attacks...

Cheers

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Day 81: Approaching girls in the pub...

Had couple of new experiences lately, but this post will focus on the more interesting one :-)
it will deal mostly with approach anxiety and social issues...here we go...


You see, couple of days ago I went out with friends to have a drink in a nice local pub, got dressed nice and lately I'm in the mood to get out of the house all the time, or maybe I'm in the mood to no stay in the house all the time...Anyways we decided to go out to get a drink, so my friend picked me up and we drove the place...

 there was nice dub music and nice atmosphere, the place wasn't too crowded...maybe it was still early...


Anyways, we were talking and drinking, I talked with the bar tender a bit and with my friends, than the place started to get crowded and this group of two hot girls and this guy came in and sat at the other end of the place...


Then I felt this feeling again, like I usually would, I just wanted to get up and start talking with one of those girls, drank another beer, than In seconds I went over there and started talking to the all group, and while I'm actually doing it, walking up to a group of complete strangers and talking to them i could hear my self saying in my head "dude, this is so easy! it so easy!" they were really nice, we had some chit chat and a smoke, i found out she's this guy girl friend and the other girl is his sister, so nothing romantic came out of this but, i was so amazed that i did that...ok ok...so i drank some beers before...never the less, I could never do that and never have done that before, because usually i would get panic attack just thinking about doing something like this, later in the same bar i went downstairs to the level below and started making eye contact with this other girl, i felt as if i could act on it and hit on her but something told me to end this night with the success i already had...


this was amazing...I think my friends looked at me with open jaws...that was so unlike me...but I hope this is just the begriming of the upgraded me released... the day after was a bit fuzzy because i drank so much, so i was very tired...


today I'm good, a bit bored but good...


I know what you're wondering...what about the blind date...well there's a storm going on lately, we're waiting for the weather to get better and than we will meet, hopefully in a day or two... but worry not, you'll be the first to know how it went...


note to self: learn to enjoy things, not just do em.


love you all and take care!

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No special dramas! communication skills released.

Been couple of days since my last post, I had a very busy week and a lot on my mind…

Here's a quick review of what happened these days and what I went through…

I had some work related meetings this week with some people I didn’t knew and some I haven't seen a long, long time, went very good I think…its amazing how easy it is to communicated when you're not so busy with dealing with the panic attacks, anxiety and depression, it was actually fun.

I was at a barbeque with friends, made everyone laugh. That's funny, usually I would just try survive the situation if would get myself to ever get out of the house and when I did find myself in those situation I would never talk or talk as less as possible, but this time I couldn't shut up, I was funny, interesting and seems like people really enjoyed my company. Its like I feel I can finally truly express myself , my real self around people and that's awesome.

Later the same week I called this new girl I'm suppose to date today, her name is Carrie and once again it's a blind date, now you're probably asking yourself why am I doing this to myself…lol so was I, but my plan is to attack my greatest fears, one by one, until I will comfortable around people. I had a conversation with her over the phone, it went smooth, I felt relaxed and made her laugh, seems like I'm improving all the time, she sounded a bit "old" or "too slow" on the phone but maybe its just me, never the less will try to meet her open minded and have fun, get some more experience and gain more confidence – this is mostly what I'm after mostly lately.

Later, still the same week… on the way saw this girl that couldn't open a door and I helped her, also at launch talked to the waitresses a bit went nice too, I think she want something from me? Maybe not… I'm still fighting myself to break a specific barrier that really annoys me when it comes to approaching strangers and initiating conversations with them. I really want to be able to do that.

After that day I woke up ok, but almost forgot to take the pill again... lately I'm forgetting that I take pills at all… which is good but bad cause I don’t want to forget or skip a day, anyways , I've made an emergency package of cipralex pills and placed it in my wallet for emergency situations.
had to come back home to take it... I place a My Appetite is getting better lately…and over all I had no special dramas this week, thinking a lot about getting a girlfriend, I have another blind date today, I wonder how it will go…

Thats it for now, I will update you how it went on my blind date...:-) wish me luck...and take care!

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Cipralex and Blind Dating

Yesterday I had a blind date with this cute girl, all I can is that it was a very good practice for me, and I could be at ease and just have fun and conversation most of the time, eventually it didn't work out but the fun part is, that I didn't care much :-) at least not too much, and now I have another date, the thing is that usually in the past I would worry and focus on myself too much , that will make look like a freak, and this time I was cool, I mean there were couple of seconds here and there of something that reminded the social anxiety but it lasted only few seconds and went away...


well don't know if that aspect of cipralex interest you much, if it does I can shade some more light about it, let me know...


take care!

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Forgetting about the pills

I've notice that two times I totally forgot that i'm taking cipralex... almost actually forgot to take the pills, but eventually i remember, but its a good sign, Its like all the side effects are totally gone...

just wanted to share that too :-)

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Day 63 - 73 with 15mg cipralex: Attacking on all fronts

Hello everybody, here's a quick review of what happend these days...

* I talked to a girl on a bar(complete stranger...i would could never do that before)

* I started singing to myself a lot lately, specially in the morning... and in the shower...thats funny...isn't it?

* bought lots of cool clothes (dealt with lots of people doing that...so it was fun to see i can handle that)

* I feel bored, or maybe I just need a relationship...at night it was really boring it was raining so i was stuck at home...again...

* thinking about getting a girlfriend again...

* singing on the morning, i set a meeting with this company that makes matches between people...(I need love, not some sentimental prison)

* went to the meeting i set, when i came to the front door i had a kind of starting of panic attack but it was for like a milisecond than i just went right in and had fun. that was amazing that I could handle that, normally the pressure,anxiety and panic would be overwhelming...I developed some nice techniques to get my self to deal with all the issues that bother me, more about that in future posts...had an interview at the meeting with this guy, i think I made really good impression on him...

* thinking about one of the girls i run into in the shops... i should talk to her...

* its very cold lately , but i'm feeling better ,i'm starting to notice a change in the way i interact with people and all the things i used to worry about seem so far now...sometimes i cant even remember them sometimes

* went to the cinema and to drink something and had some people it was fun.

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Things I've Tried Before Cipralex

Hi there, just so you'll know I haven't just jumped into this, and you shouldn't too, here's the stuffs I tried before cipralex (which tops them all, at least for me and my issues):

1. Hypnosis
2. NLP
3. Home remedies
4. Herbal and nutritional supplements
5. Saint John's worth
6. 5htp Supplements
7. Shrink
8. Psychotherapist
9. Self Help books, films, audios
10. seroxat
11. Valerian Drops
12. Chinese Acupuncture

some of them helped less some helped more, but when I compare cipralex with all of them, its much better and the changes are happening real fast.

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Boring...Boring...Boring

Lately I've noticed I get bored when I do nothing, staying at home is boring, watching tv is also boring... this is a major thing for me, usually time will just fly for me even if I don't do nothing , I never felt bored... but this is a very positive thing for me, I guess I haven't noticed I wasn't doing much because I was very very busy thinking about what I should do, or avoid... panic attacks, social anxiety and depression...well seems BORING to me now...that's something isn't it...

there's this old saying, you gotta look at your worst fear in the eyes and watch him look down... this is what i'm doing to all my fears...

I've made a genius plan to deal with all my fears one by one, I've discovered how to trick myself into it and i'm keep pushing my self forward...

I will tell you more about this in the coming up posts...

take care!

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Happy New Year

Well the last couple of days were something, I've been in lots of places and had just to interact with people here and there, which is still amazing for me because just getting out of the house, not to mention being around people i don't know was "an issue" for me, this time it was easy and kinda fun.

Its almost a week now since i've increased the dosage from 10 mg to 15 mg, and i'm starting to feel the difference, I notice slowly slowly how I become more relaxed in past stressing situations and get this "I dont care" or "bring it on" kind of feeling...I like that.

I've to couple of stragers ,was'nt much of a conversation but still its another step forward just to do it and see that i can do it and stay a live and without a panic attack, that's something.

Cipralex side effects are totally gone now... sometimes I forget I take it...

Some folks asked me about cipralex and sex issues, I promise to post some information about that too, I know it effects and important to many of you...

Another things worth mentioning is that I get kinda bored a lot lately, but I guess its a good thing cause it make wana do stuffs...just need to figure out what...

anyways, take care everybody and comment - its important and gives me an execuse to keep writing.

love you all

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What goes up ususally goes down before going up again

hi,
someone asked me if cipralex feeling can get better and then worse again?
the answer is yes, this means two things:

1. you're in the starting phase or your body is still adjusting to the pill, usually will pass after the first few months...

2. you need to increase the dosage.

but consult your doctor, this is what I would do.

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Mind your steps!

As i've mentioned in earlier posts its crucial to notice the small changes and to put them in the spot lights, and lately there were many.

Including: when i walked the street some guys came up to me and wanted to take a photo of me for some project their doing for school, so i agreed , than in a store i had a problem paying with credit card so i had to talk to the bank on the phone, took a lot of time and patience and apparently I kept my coolness or so it seemed to the three girls that were there,

complimented me about that, and later on i felt one of them was kinda hot and maybe i should hit on her or at least try to start a conversation... I will do that tommorow I wonder what will happen... also went out to this show, with some friends, was ok, but in the enterance I kinda flirted a bit with the girl that sold the tickets... it was fun and short...

show was ok too, than we went to drink something and met another girlfriend of one of the girls, she was very shy... i think i managed the situation well, drank two beers was ok.

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Day or two after increasing the dosage

Started the 15 MG today, lets see how it goes...
I'm also invited to a barbecue at friends place - was fun and went very well, I actually had fun and had some nice conversations with people.

Bought a new jacket and some awesome shirts, also went out to the beach, visited a restaurant, chat with the waitress went ok, than met a friend on the way home, invited her over with her boyfriend, sat and chatted for a while, than went out to see this show with friends was nice too.

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Day 55 to Day 57 - Meeting with the doctor

Here's a quick review of what's going on...

took the motorcycle from the garage today went fine, had a long conversation with a taxi driver , we end up shaking hands and i think i convinced him to write a book :) lol, after that I had a meeting with my lawyer where i think i demonstrated some alpha, and got my self shiatsu massage too later that day

had meeting with my doc yesterday, was weird waiting in the waiting room , some really weird people were there, Felt like i don't belong, anyways, I've decided together with the doc to increase the dosage from 10mg to 15mg for the next month and see how it goes, the cipralex did good so far, I do feel major improvement, however I want to radicate and terminate the panic attacks and anxiety totally, so we've decided to increase the dosage even thought that it works.

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Day 54: Cipralex, Wine and Fancy Dinner

Just came back from a fancy restaurant, drank some wine and ate some fancy food with my family, considering all the circumstances its amazing I haven't gave this too much thought like I would do in the (not so far) past,

usually I would think about it before and get into a panic attack worrying about how I would handle it, this time, I just didn't thought about it much, was more focused on the present, I communicated nicely with everyone and with the waitresses and made her laugh too,
it was nice, also started investing more in the way I dress.

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